Getty images/David Cannon

By Kent Gray
If Bryson DeChambeau’s golf turns out half as good this week as his press conference prelude, the 30^th edition of the Omega Dubai Desert Classic shapes as an absolute doozy.

From unashamed childhood tantrums to Tiger creating a monster, slow play to “methodical” fast walking, to putting with the flag in for a maiden major and sympathy for the humble fairway divot, DeChambeau took the gathered media on an enthralling journey.

There was even chat about burgers and the “secret sauce” he’s apparently discovered to negotiate the Majlis’ grainy greens, an undoubtedly perplexing formula we probably wouldn’t understand even if the world No.5 was prepared to share his latest scientific breakthrough. But he wasn’t.

DeChambeau claimed low amateur honours in his only previous visit to Emirates Golf Club in 2016, a week where he says he played well but putted poorly and yet still finished T-18.

We’ve seen you spraying water on your golf balls in practice before, so have you been testing things here? Have you figured out how to boss the Majlis’ moss?

“Yes, I have and I’m not going to say. Yeah, that’s part of the secret sauce.”

It was the tempting entrée to a smorgasbord of thoroughly quotable treats from the 25-year-old American who has returned to the Majlis on a hot streak of four (of his five) PGA Tour victories in his last 13 starts. With the same big name characters wheeled in week-after-week, pre-tournament pressers the world over are often turgid affairs but DeChambeau wants to be the best golfer he can possibly be and that confidence clearly extends to the media room. His answers are considered and entertaining, his ambition unapologetically self-assured.

“I’ve set my sights on an international win, and then also majors, for sure,” said DeChambeau who finished seventh at the Sentry Tournament of Champions and then T-10 at the Sony Open in Hawaii en-route to Dubai.

“Coming off two top-10 finishes not playing my best, I think there’s obviously room for improvement and if I’m able to successfully improve a little bit here and there with putting and iron play, and make the correct adjustments this week that the course affords me, I’ll be right there at the end of the week. I just have to finish the job.”

A journalist recalled DeChambeau’s last visit and the then 21-year-old’s utter conviction in his unusual methods despite being the victim of ridicule for things like his universal length clubs.  Now you’re in the game’s top echelon, seemingly a major champion in waiting, are you satisfied you’ve silenced the critics?

“There’s more to achieve. And for me, it’s not necessarily about being No. 1. I mean, that’s the result of all the hard work, right?

“For me, it’s more about understanding the game at a whole other level that’s never really been done before. That’s what I want to achieve, different insight into all the different variables that you go through having to adjust properly to the course at hand.”

If there has been one criticism of DeChambeau it has been his occasional on-course meltdowns. Another writer asked the Ryder Cupper if he felt he was too hard on himself but didn’t even get the chance to finish his question before DeChambeau jumped in with a boyhood story that speaks volumes of his psyche.

“No, I’m always hard on myself. If you watched me in 2013, I threw a Gatorade bottle down, just threw a water battle down. It was only because I won by seven, not 10,” he said to bemused laughter. “It’s just the way I am. It’s who I am. I want to be the absolute best at every single point in time in my life.

“I have a video of it, too. It was funny. It was at Creekside Golf Club. It’s a public golf course back in Modesto, California. Shot 70 the first day and shot 77 the second day, and I won my age group, but not the overall and knew I had a chance to do it. Won by seven in my age group but wasn’t satisfied. Made a bogey on my last one and missed a five-footer.

“I don’t define myself by winning margins. I define myself by executing to the level that I know I can. It’s just the way I am.”

DeChambeau’s stance on putting with the flag in is well documented – “it’s statistically proven to be a benefit in 99 percent of situations” – but his take on the new rules was typically well-considered.

“The spike mark one intrigues me, just because it’s related to hitting a shot in the fairway and it goes into a divot, why is that not ground under repair just like a spike mark? Somebody damaged the fairway, it was actually damaged by a player. So why is that not repairable? Why can’t you get relief from that?

“So that’s kind of the only one that’s been like, eh, doesn’t make sense fully yet. But I truly appreciate it. I love tapping down spike marks. It’s great. It’s afforded me the opportunity to make more putts now because of it.”

DeChambeau was asked if he believed the new rules would speed up play as they’re ultimately intended to do but turned the question around to often being put on the clock himself for slow play.

“Most people know I’m a methodical guy when I’m over the ball. But when I’m walking to it, I’m the fastest one walking,” he said.

“The time for me is measuring shots. That’s where I make up everything, but if you have someone that takes their time getting there but plays quick, it’s terrible for me because it makes me look bad. Whereas I take the same amount of time to play as the other guy does, it’s just doing it differently. But the way it works out, I get hurt by it.”

Moving swiftly along, DeChambeau was never going to get away without a comment on Tiger Woods who makes his 2019 bow at the Farmers Insurance Open at Torrey Pines this week.

Tommy Fleetwood said he might have a wee flutter on the former world No.1 winning his 15^th major this year. Would you like a share in that wager?

“Hopefully I have something to say on that,” DeChambeau said with reference to his own major ambitions before returning to topic.

“I would say that he’s got a very good chance, absolutely. Augusta is obviously one of his favourites. Pebble Beach is pretty solid, he loves that place.

“But I think there’s a lot of other good players, as well, now. He’s spurred up a lot of incredible young players …he influenced me to become better. He influenced Jordan. He influenced Rory, a bunch of people, everyone out here.

“That’s the cool part is that he’s now seeing what he created, so it’s funny (laughing) but he’s still a 14-time major champion. He knows how to get it done, so it’s going to be a difficult test if we’re going up against him, but it will be fun.”

Just like this week shapes as entertaining with DeChambeau in full “Mad Scientist” mode. So, what do you enjoy about this golf course?

“The driving aspect of it. It’s so difficult out here to drive it in the fairway every single hole. You’re going to hit it in the rough, so if you’re a guy that can hit most of the fairways, you’re going to have a great chance to win.

“It’s something that I love doing, executing drives really, really well. It’s a good test of my ability to do that. I know I’m a great ball-striker, but we’ll see how good I am.”

If Wednesday’s press conference is any indication of the form DeChambeau’s is in, the field can’t say they haven’t been warned.